Good Gay Rates At First Stereotypical Bank.

24/04/2010 at 10:10 am (Banking, Gay, Humour)

At the First Stereotypical Bank, we have tailor made accounts for all minorities. We’re excited to launch a series of new products for gay men. Whether you’re a twink just starting out, or a predatory old poof, there’s an ideal scheme for you!

First Time Flamer

For the young gayer, this can be a difficult time. Clean up that worry of being booted out of your parent’s house, and sing “Hello Dolly” to all that lolly. We have great rates on our accounts that will keep you in frosted tip highlights and Aussibum underwear. Our First Time Flamer rates are open for applicants from the age of 16, until middle age at 26.

If it’s dear, we’re here, get used to it

Now’s the time to take control and dominate your finances. Planning that trip to San Francisco? Perhaps you’ve seen that nippy little car in that colour that goes with your shoes? We’ll spaff the cash right in your face! Like a night out on the scene, our interest rates are competitive and aggressively low. Now’s the time to hook up that sling, stock up on poppers and build your Leather Daddy Dungeon  – you’ll be fisting the night away!

If he wanted it, he shoulda put a roof over it

Today, it’s hard to run a household on one income. With a revolving door of lovers it’s even less likely you’ll get a mortgage for anything bigger than a darkroom. We have mortgage rates with a special discount for you and your true significant other. Our Hag At Home deal means that you can set up for your future with the one person that can never leave you. Crying over “Beaches” with your bestest friend and tubs of Chunky Monkey until the day you die needn’t be just a pipe dream!

For you space age queers, we have excellent rates for those that have decided to “get married”. Of course we take your application as a civilly partnered couple seriously, and we will support you every step of the way. Set up “home” with your manwife, and “entertain” the “neighbours”. You can be just like real married people!

Choose First Stereotypical: We bring you financial services with dignity, professionalism and, oh look, a fluffy, sparkly pen!*

*Colours of free fluffy, sparkly pen may vary


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